Saturday, 18 February 2023

Overthinking by the Sea

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
Did I overreact? Or did he? 

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
Thinking whether I should be upset with my friends? Or find a reason not to be?

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
Is my mom upset with me? I left her all alone in the kitchen, preparing lunch for the family while I go out to have coffee?

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
Why do I go silent when we quarrel? My brain automatically switches off and no signal transmission to feel?

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
But I am upset with my friends. I asked for help and no one replied. Maybe I'm overreacting. Maybe this was intended to be.

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
What a beautiful day it is today. Car window half cracked open, breeze coming through, sun shining so warmly on the left half of my face, making me want to dissappear into the vastness of the sea.

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
Why did he react so strongly? We just got up and left? Was is it worth to ruin a beautiful day unnecessarily?

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
I wish I could just mute my brain for a few minutes. Not think of anything. Not worry about anything. Not feel anything but the joy and beauty of the view infront of me.

Sitting alone, in my car, by the sea:
Will he be reading this anytime soon? And when he does? What will he think about today and the silent quarrel between him and me? 

Sitting alone, in my car and overthinking by the sea; tomorrow, a new day. Tomorrow, new worries to think of; tomorrow, a new me.